Welcome to the Love, Sex, and Leadership podcast where you can discover simple tantric teachings to embody your true power, awaken your soul's wisdom, and live an inspired life as a natural, intuitive, and heart-centered leader. Receiving a deep breath in. No. Just placing your hand on the heart and hand on the belly of the balls. Connecting into. The body temple. And the question of inquiry is. How is your relationship with your value? Do you value? Time and the energy you put into the world. Do you undervalue yourself? Do you? Show up and recognize the value that you bring as a father, as a. Man, there's a Partner With the business owner. Do you let people take advantage of you? You stand strong in your beliefs and ideas. Do you have a capacity to receive the input of others? What value do you place upon you as a man in society? You constantly comparing yourself. People you see Social media. The news and. In the area of life. You wake up each morning and recognize the gift of life that you bring to each and every moment. The way in which your mere value of presence and love. It's essentially priceless. It has no price that can be put upon it. Breathe in that energy. Let go of the sound. Opening your eyes when you're ready. So this morning, we're gonna do. Practice diving deep into our Relationship with money. Anyone ever have challenges with this in their life. And the other thing that we'll be looking at is our capacity as a man to Receive feedback. The capacity to. Know our value, but then to also in knowing our value have the capacity to be seen through the eyes of others which we kind of opened the doorway to that. The other day in some of the mirrors and reflections and the group sharing. Um, so just take a few minutes here just to share some of the. You could say principles or values that I look at in terms of, you know, my own relationship with money in the world, and You know, as a young child. Money definitely didn't grow on trees and. There was, uh, I remember often bill collectors and individuals would call the house and I picked up the phone and I could see my parents on the other side. Tell him I'm not home. That was a pretty standard operation for my 6 to 10 year old. answering the phone for my parents to tell the people that were trying to get money out of them that they weren't home. They were never home. And also in the winter, you know, there's numerous winters. I remember when we just happened to have candlelight dinners and, you know, I had to have a candle in the, in the bathroom and You know, I grew up in Boston and we're not paying for electricity. It got pretty cold sometimes, not all the time, of course, they did their best and you know, I love and appreciate both of them. But the place of valuing. Themselves and valuing the work that they were bringing in and also just the relationship to money, you know, money in my perspective is this means of energy exchange, part of the somatic journey that will take more money is unpacking some of where the beliefs and the ideas and the. The thought processes and the interpretations of reality are around, you know, this currency around this piece of paper shall we carry around where we spend a lot of time, energy, value in our lives acquired. And you know, I found in my own life. There's times when I thought a lot, there's times when I thought a little, I had a lot of different meaning structures around that, but what I have noticed is that I get to make the meaning of what it is inside of me and someone doesn't need to do that for me. What has been higher on my values in the last 4 or 5 years was. Landing and grounding more earth temples, and that was part of my inspiration with with Bali and as soon as I had that recognition, it was like I had to then open myself to learn how to receive more. I've never been driven by just putting this into the thing. I have friends I grew up with that have just been driven by like I want more money, more money and more money. That's not fair than a drive for me when I was able to. Connect my desire for living on the earth and connecting more to nature in that way to recognizing in order to do that, I have to make some more of this. OK, what do I need to do to make more of this? Ah, I can do this. I can offer this for, I can do these retreats, etc. And I really saw that the value behind my decision making wasn't to try to prove my worth. By getting more money in the bank account, because when I was a sailor operating ships around the world, I made a fuck ton of money. I had a lot of money, spent a lot of money, and it was, it just came naturally and easily, and then a lot of money came and a lot of money went and I found myself in a similar place, 5, 10 years later. And I was able to connect the dots more to recognize, ah, this is what inspires me, and some people are inspired by the zeros in their bank account but hasn't inspired me. I see how that can add value to the things I want to do in the world, and by doing that, I realized I need to have more zeros in the bank account to show up in this way. And this for me is one of the important pieces, especially for a man. Driven in the world and wanting to be on purpose and wanting to show up and be a provider and, you know, support himself and his family. And have any of you ever struggled in that way with being a provider and supporting, you know, your loved ones? Yeah, and it feels like, how does that feel inside? It's like, fuck, I can't even fucking show up and court the people I love. And so part of what I, I wanna invite us into deeper today is to look at what beliefs and ideas are you still holding on to just as we did with our, you know, aspects of our sexual body this week, just as we've done with aspects of our emotional body. The beliefs and the ideas that we hold around money are these stagnant half spins of quantum energy in the body. That keep attracting the same situations, which is probably why you keep having the same money situation over and over and over again, because there's something in that situation that you haven't learned to love, honor, and appreciate yet. And when you meet it face to face and say, Ah, I see what this is reminding me of. I see how this is making me feel all the pain and agony and suffering and things that I went through as a child or challenges around money and I've, I'm far from fucking perfect around money. But I've got a long way based upon continually meeting not just money, but the somatic imprint it has in my body. You know, the other side of my childhood, my sister was like, I don't want to have any worries whatsoever about money ever, and she's a partner at one of the largest financial management companies in the world dealing with millions and billions of dollars across her desk. Super tight about money but has a lot of it and does does well she's like, I want my kids to never have to worry about money. The result I see with that is the kids are quite spoiled with money. They have everything they want, which is amazing. But it's like look at this ebb and flow that happens. You think you want to provide all this stuff, but it's not actually the gift that's going to support the growth and evolution of the soul. And I look at, you know, my nephews and they're having their own souls journey. They've certainly called this in. They have a lot of abundance around them. I'm sure they'll have their journey and what is there for their growth. But more important is if you look at your own life. Where have your continual struggles been with money? Where are your continual places that you've hit the same brick wall over and over again? And if you ask yourself, well, what's the the gift? What is this brick wall trying to show me? What is it trying to bring into my awareness and how can I through that situation, learn to love, honor and value myself more on the inside because it. You're out there, you know, doing whatever you're doing, but inside you feel empty, broken, and not actually worth the value that you're putting on the table, you're probably gonna attract situations like that. So part of the the rearranging and the shifting of what's happening on the inside is so that what's happening on the outside changes. For me that was I felt good on the inside, but I didn't have an associated value and worth to have money in the bank to be able to provide the things that I wanted more in life because in my twenties and when I was traveling, I had everything I wanted. I made good money. I traveled, I. Did what I wanted to do. I was like, why do I need more of it? I do what I want to do. And as I started to realize, oh, there's things that I want more of. There's other levels of stability of structure that I want to support both myself and beloveds coming into my life and family to be able to feel more of that stability so that they can flourish as well. So we're looking at really at the base of our money, our relationship to safety. Our relationship to being safe in this body and if there's some part of you that's not feeling safe in this body, which is why all throughout this week we've just been going back to into the body into the body, feeling what's alive, feeling what's there so that safety can actually be rewired into a deeper level of strength inside of you. Deep breath in Uh Um I used to hate money. And I've been through many different journeys with money, my. The imprint that I got about money was money was bad. The people who had money were bad, they were the drug dealers, the gangsters, the sales people. My father just made money and never sent it back to the family. He's always working away and then when he died, he left us in a huge amount of debt and he had to sell the house and so for me when I remember him taking me one time to town to go by and m pen. And we didn't have food in the fridge. And goes and buys a 400 pound mumblelo pen which in the 80s would be a lot of fucking money. Super confused. And the message that I got was like. Money is bad. Money is something that makes us do bad things, and it's something that you can only make through doing things you don't want to do. That was my message. I went to work in casinos, stealing money from people. I went to work in sales in Mexico, stealing money from people, and I made a fuck ton of money. And I had an apartment in Cancun, I had a BMW convertible, I had everything that I wanted and I was completely known because I wasn't following this. I was following this. Deep breath Uh But it was OK because it was just me and I could do what I want, I could have money and then I lost money and it was no problem and then I, then I have kids. And I'm like, holy shit. Now what they do. Now if I don't have food in the fridge, it not only affects me, but it now affects these beings that I've brought into this world and then looking at me. To take care of them. Am I gonna do the same thing my father did? And I was like in this journey. I want to make money from doing something that I love. I want to study psychology, I want to work with people, and I was terrified because I was convinced still at that point you cannot make money doing the things that you love. People who work in charities, people who work in nonprofits, they don't make money. So there was always this, if you make money, you have to cheat and otherwise you're just gonna survive. So I had to really fight with this and really work with this in order to constantly go for what it was that was my deep. The burden that was to work with people, and I had to face it again and again and again. My wife ended up leaving me because we didn't have enough money, and many other things, but uh, because we, I wasn't able to provide yet the lives that I believed that we could have. And now I'm there. And now I'm selling coaching programs for 1020 130 40 $150,000. Did I believe that that was possible back then? No. Do I believe it now? Yes. Deep breath. how But it still comes up. They're still like, oh no I can't charge more, I can't er up my prices. I'm constantly being faced by these challenges around what is my value. And yet there's people around the world who believe their values so deeply. That money just flows through them. So what is the ceiling? We all have this ceiling, and we're constantly meeting, I've made this all the time, this new ceiling of what is the possibilities, what are the quantum possibilities for a tractor. I believe it's something I'll be working with until the day that I'm done. And can I let it go, and can I let it go, knowing that I can survive if I have to. I've seen what happens when I've lost all my money and when I've done that with kids, and I will do anything. I worked in school and cleaned toilets and 6, so I've been in school for a year. Cleaning 3 to 4 hours a day at the beginning of my journey while I was studying psychology, and I've never felt so proud of myself during this time. I could go and look at my kids in the eye and go, I am working towards something Penny. And I never let him down. So I know no matter what happens, I will always survive and my family will always survive. That gives him the power. To find my vote. In my life right now. The As we dive into these subjects, it's really a a looking at in your own life where your relationship has been with money. Where the, the high points, the low points, and ultimately, where have you probably been getting in your own way. Where have you been, you know, sabotaging yourself in your capacity. And you know, in the realms of this world of psychology and transformational coaching. You know, I, I also feel that. There should be a value upon. The knowledge, awareness, and expertise people are bringing in. What I also see is people that really get great at marketing and money and things like that sometimes aren't always delivering the same quantity and value, but that's the value that they're putting to it, and that's really the gift of it. It's like if there's something inside of you and you know the impact that you can make in your life and the lives of others and you put a value to it and you stand to it, that's essentially. What we do when we go to the supermarket, we look at an item that's like this value is this the value that I agree upon to purchase this thing? Yes, OK, I'm buying it. Who sets the price, all these different things. So who sets the value of the things that in the offerings that you bring into the world? I know a lot of you guys worked in a variety of different things, but. What I realized is that the only person that sets the value. It's right here. There's a lot of people that can have a lot of opinions about what the value is, and I personally think in my own programs from working in this world for 1617 years. I know people I started with that have at least 1 to 20s and things that I'm similar programs that we're doing, and I sometimes am like, oh I should charge more, but I've also been like, I want there's a very specific niche of people that I feel like I'm wanting to reach and I do reach. And I find if the value goes up more that some of those individuals get lost in a way. And I, I love and I value that other people put more zeros on their programs and it's beautiful. And I know some people have been doing this for 30 years and still charge, you know, €100 for a session and things like that, and that's just the value they're at. Who's right, who's wrong? Nobody. You know, I always think of the roomy quote when I look at these things like out beyond the ideas between wrongdoing and right doing, there's a field, and I'll meet you there. So what one person's value is isn't the wrong or right thing. What your value is isn't the wrong or right thing. And if you're working in industries. That set the value for what you need to do, and then you have another organizational structure that's impacting the value that you can put in. And this is also my journey in coaching. I came from a maritime military world where everything was very Structured and had to be very clear. I worked at this amount for this job. I get paid this amount and I realized that when I went into more coaching work and transformational work, I didn't want any body or governing agency to tell me how I was gonna work, what prices I had to set or anything else like that. I wanted the freedom to be able to work. That way because what I've witnessed, especially the last 10 years is the more value that I know that I'm providing and not just the value of, oh, I'm gonna add a 0 to the the amount people are paying, but the value that I'm witnessing in people's lives, that's the impact where I'm like, fuck, actually I'm recognizing the need to charge more and that's really the place where I've increased in prices and things like that because there's more of a demand coming in. And I'm recognizing that my time and energy for the value I'm offering, I need to value that as something where I feel good about it and that's a continual journey and meeting of yourself more and more and I know a lot of you worked in different realms of this world so you do, so you don't. This to me is where you find your true essence you find like. In my, when I'm making the exchange, like I just got a massage this morning and that was the value that she put upon it for that hour and a half massage, and it's like that's OK, beautiful. In Bali, when I get a massage, it's a different value. In Switzerland, when I get a massage, that's a different value. These are values based upon location, place. Society, all these things is one right or wrong? No, it's just different qualities of qualities of understanding the value and the circumstance and the and the situation that you're in. So I share all of this so the mind can actually begin to recognize the, the balance of value, time and energy that's always happening in our in our lives, it's happening in every area of life. And what the invitation is to find more of well, how do you bring your value into the world as a way of really the essence of your soul shining itself, not your ego, which I know for me in my maritime world and you know Shiba and what he was sharing like made a lot of money but felt a bit empty inside. It was just the mind that was acquiring it. And I knew that I needed to do something where I could wake up every day and say, yes, I fucking love this work. I would do these retreats. I would do coaching sessions regardless of whether or not I was getting paid. I do get paid because I recognize the value that's in it that wants to expand how I'm showing up in the footprint that I'm making in the plant. I was part of the inspiration for writing a book. I make money through that, but I wanted to reach more people with that. There's a few other books that are coming through me. So this is the value and the impact that you have as an as a being, that can then impact those around you that can then understand, ah, I can bring this value to the world and I can actually know that value that's inside of me as well. Deep breath in. Oh Mm. There is no one on this planet who is the same as anyone else, hm. And if you have a unique product. A unique product and nobody else can create. Can you charge whatever you want for that product. Mhm. Every single one of us is absolutely unique. If we're sweeping the floors, there's not much uniqueness that you can bring into sweeping the floors and everyone's gonna get paid the same. But if you created your own flavor, your own music, and you bring that into the world, and we do roaches, but we're very different. What someone gets from Aaron is gonna be different from what they get from me or through and through Aaron. The changes that people have in their life, the way Aaron does it could bring some other kind of transformation, but for some reason they choose me or they choose Aaron and through the work that we do, they are able to bring transformation into their life that they haven't been able to do by themselves. That is unique. You can't put a price on that. I have a a a question on my brochure. What is your transformation worth to you? Hm. If you knew, absolutely, if I give this person money, I'm gonna change my fucking life, wouldn't you just give them everything that you have? And if you know that this person is a unique being and they're gonna bring a flavor to you that you could not bring by yourself. Then he would do it, and this is why there are coaches out there who judge hundreds of thousands. And it's this kind of value that we need to look at you. I am a unique being. I bring a unique flavor to this planet and I deserve to receive. For that Deep breath. So the last thing I want to just bring forth is you look at these are two pieces of currency, both printed currency. This 1, 1000 used to be. I think it was 20-30 years ago, 1000. It's like, like this would be 1000. This was 100. There were 10 of these, that would be 1000. Now this. It's worth 100th of this, it's like $1. Argentina. So I share this because it's value that's put on. To that runs a lot of the world. They're saying that this can buy me a certain thing in the world. This can buy me. You know, somebody at the 99 cent store. 30, 20 years, 20-30 years ago, I don't know the exact timeline is Argentina. This was worth $1000. Now $1. Just think about that in terms of value and far in the newspaper currency, whatever that means for you. Deep breath in Huh.